In our society today it seems to be complete voodoo for a girl (or a guy or neither, sorry I'm being extremely gender normative here) to accept the fact that they are a reasonable looking human being. Seriously. Its crazy.
In a group chicks (at least the ones I hang out with) are always saying "I look fat" or "This outfit looks bad on me" or my personal favorite "What's wrong with my face today? Can somebody fix this? Horrible".
I think this is rooted in women's expectation to be modest. And I'm not saying modesty is bad, there is nothing worse than an arrogant prat. But what is bad is anti-modesty. I mean the reward for such tendencies is everywhere. One Direction coming to mind with
"You don't know you're beautiful....that's what makes you beautiful."
What's up with that? Seriously a no win right? The fact that you don't feel you are attractive is well, attractive. And that's royally messed up.
In terms of myself, I don't think I'm such hot shit, but I do think I'm relatively attractive. As I put it to others when asked about this "I think I'm good looking enough that my appearance wouldn't prevent me from the goals,men,career aspirations, etc that I want, but I don't think I am attractive enough for my appearance will provide any of those (or additional) opportunities. And you know what? That's totally ok. Having a positive self image of yourself is healthy and necessary in having a positive mentality towards others. That old phrase of you have to love yourself before loving yourself is not so wrong. And it makes me just so mad to see all the beautiful people in my life, both on the outside and inside, (he, she or they) not see that. Or if they see that, not feel comfortable sharing that love with others thinking it's wrong/selfish/stupid sounding. It's not selfish to love yourself, it's a must. And I think it's the people who don't love themselves that end up being those selfish arrogant prats, not those who have truely come to terms with themselves and their body.
So Ladies (and gents) please be happy with yourselves. There's a line between modesty/self deprecating and legitimate self loathing. I don't know how we found ourselves still in this pickle of a female gender role that equates helplessness, denial and passiveness to attractiveness. And speaking to my fellow ladies, please chill it with the self loathing comments, its getting really annoying to get ready for a party together. After I reassure you for the 40th time that you look nice (this goes for men too) drop it. I obviously think you look good and your pestering isn't really productive or relevant. I mean what do you want me to say "Well actually you look like a furry ball of shit and I never want to be in your presence again due to your hair/dress/facial hair/etc today and I look forward to disregarding my love of your personality and charm in this comment/decision"
In conclusion, follow the path of philosophers of LMFAO and say "I'm sexy and I know it."
worrrrrd.
ReplyDelete